Saturday, June 3, 2023

Leave the lecturers alone!

I can’t understand what all the fuss is about. Everyone is adopting a holier than thou attitude on this matter. To me it is straightforward. Let’s look at it this way. If you have a cousin who works at the bakery, you know that he will come home every evening with a loaf of bread. Actually, he can pitch with several loaves and give some to the neighbours. When he goes to the village over the holidays, everyone looks forward to his arrival with great anticipation because there will be lots of bread to eat. Likewise, families with a father or brother who works in a butchery never go short of meat.

In fact, they have a variety to choose from. If all the stewing beef was bought by regular customers, at least the family can be sure of having intestines for dinner. Considered a delicacy, if they too have been bought, he can bring some bones to be made into gravy. If he is well organised he can even do a roaring trade on the side selling goat hooves and heads of sheep to street caterers. All these items are not paid for. They come into the possession of the man who works at the bakery or at the butchery by virtue of him having a nice job accompanied by fringe benefits. It happens all over the place. Company executives just instruct the driver to drop off a few things at any place they wish. If there is some cash to be doled out, executives don’t go to the home of the concubine in broad daylight. They send a driver in the company car. It is acceptable. It is a perk that comes with the job. Take a nurse at the hospital. When she gets a headache, does she go to the local pharmacy to purchase tablets over the counter?

No ways. She reaches into the drug cupboard and swallows a few tablets paid for by the taxpayer. Again it is nothing. It comes with the job. Do you think a mechanic who wants to fix his wife’s car has to go buy a tool kit? He simply takes the garage tool kit with him after hours and puts it to good use in aid of dearest. Take teachers. Their studies are funded by the government. In turn, the teachers are paid to teach our kids. But after work, using their training funded by the government they give remedial lessons to their own kids who are too dumb to catch up in class. No one will report to the authorities that they found a teacher giving her daughter extra lessons after school. Though not included in the contract, it is one of the perks of the job. We could go on and on. How about a veterinary surgeon who uses his skills to treat a disease outbreak that has afflicted his uncle’s cows. It happens all the time. I don’t remember anyone raising a fuss.

Hence my confusion over what is happening at the university. Lately there has been a hue and cry to the effect that some lecturers sleep with their female students. Just what is wrong with it? Sadly, very few lecturers dress well and drive nice cars. But if a female student is willing to overlook the scruffy appearance and get between the sheets with her lecturer why should anyone be concerned? I used to think female university students were all above the age of sixteen. And the last time I checked sixteen was the age of sexual consent. I mean it is not as if scruffy lecturers are defiling under age kids. It must also be noted that lecturers have normal feelings just like you and I. I know lots of working men who in the evenings prowl the university in sleek cars, looking for hot young things to unblock their vessels and cleanse their blood. They take them on escapades across the border. They buy them nice clothes and expensive cellphones. Many of these men are old enough to be fathers of the hot young things. Now, if everyone wants a piece of the action why should lecturers be exempt? If every man in the city wants a young university student to unblock his vessels and cleanse his blood where do we expect our academics to receive a similar service? If your answer is their wives and girlfriends, then why doesn’t everyone follow suit? I will tell you why. It is because the wives and girlfriends are not up to the task. Granted, some lecturers are said to demand sex in return for giving good marks. Personally, I don’t believe this poppycock story. If the pretty student is struggling so much then she should really not be at varsity.

But, hey, what is wrong with a scruffy lecturer giving a few bonus points to a female student who is willing to play along? Like I said, it happens everywhere. From our school days we all know of the nice, but dim-witted kids in class who would get a few bonus marks at exam time because they were favourites of the teacher. How about civil servants who connive to promote their relatives and friends in return for a similar favour to be extended likewise? I think people are being dishonest for crying foul simply because lecturers dole out a few bonus points to students they sleep with. We all enjoy certain perks in our jobs. Truth be told some of the perks we extend to ourselves verge on corruption because we misuse our positions to deprive deserving people of certain opportunities. Lecturers don’t do that. They don’t take the marks of one student to give to another.

Everyone gets their fair marks. Only the favourite female who sleeps with the lecturer gets a bonus on top. And because everything is consensual, it is not as if the lecturer is stealing anything that belongs to another person. If you say female students have boyfriends, well everyone else sleeps with wives and girlfriends of other people. Other people also sleep with our wives and girlfriends. So that one is a non starter. In conclusion, I hope not to hear anything more about the issue. Let the lecturers enjoy the perks of office. How do we expect a man to be staring at the hot young things all day long and not desire them to unblock his vessels and cleanse his blood? Surely in exchange for a few bonus marks the poor, and scruffy lecturers too can do what many of us pay for in cellphones, cash, clothes, escapades across the border and pleasure drives in nice cars.
So, leave the lecturers alone!


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