We all have issues in our lives that we feel are legitimate gripes. Sometimes, it feels like they’ve taken over our minds; and that we can never be happy unless they’re resolved.
If you ever want to ensure your own unhappiness, make it contingent upon the resolution of any problem, no matter how grave, and you will be miserable! When you tell yourself that you’ll be happy once you pay off your mortgage; score that major deal; or after your terrible boss gets transferred, you could be in for a rough ride!
But that’s precisely what a lot of us do. We look at situations that are completely beyond our control, attempt to control them and when we fail, we feel discouraged and beaten.
When you choose to stay focused on any problem, you become a slave to what makes you unhappy. What’s more, you rob yourself of happiness in that moment, the very happiness you claim to be pursuing. And then you try to blame other people for your problems!
To be sure, when we’re facing major difficulties, for instance, at work, it’s hard to endure what we perceive as suffering during the day and then switch it off at night. Yet when we don’t take our attention away from the things that bother us, we prolong our suffering longer than we actually need to.
By this, I mean that the people who make us miserable are not with us in every moment, yet they continue to occupy our thoughts only because we give them pride of place in our minds. By doing this, we actually empower the people and situations we claim to despise, because our thoughts have creative power. The longer we stay focused on any adverse situation, the longer we perpetuate it in our lives.
Further, when we stay focused on our problems, we can’t possibly find the solutions. Scientific research shows that being positive actually broadens our minds, and enables us to see solutions to problems that previously eluded us.
So even if it feels odd, when you’re in a bind, find something positive to focus on, whether it has anything to do with your particular issue or not. It can be done! Whilst it may be somewhat difficult, know that it’s only because you’ve been focused on the problem so long, you’ve got a pattern going that makes it easier for negative thoughts to attract other, similar thoughts. If you interrupt the cycle of negative thoughts, by focusing on anything that makes you happy, you can begin to break the grip of negative rumination. The more you persist in looking for things that make you happy in the midst of your sorrows, the easier it will become, until looking for the good becomes your new pattern, and you start to attract that from the world around you.
Sometimes, even finding one positive thought can seem like a tall order. Under such circumstances, what should we do? Bless the situation!
Consider this story of a grocer, who was afraid that his business would be destroyed by a major chain store that opened up across the street. Each day, his problems loomed larger and larger in his own mind, until they became an obsession.
One day the grocer, in great distress, sought out a great Master. He told him of the large chain store that had opened up across the way from his shop that would drive him out of business. He emphasised that his family had owned his shop for a century, and to lose it would be catastrophic, for there was nothing else he was skilled at.
The Master replied, ‘If you fear the owner of the chain store, you will hate him. And hatred will be your undoing’.
“What shall I do?” asked the distraught grocer.
“Each morning, walk out of your shop onto the sidewalk and bless your shop, wishing it prosperity. Then, turn to face the chain store and bless it too.”
“What? Bless my competitor and destroyer?”
“Any blessing you give him will rebound to your good. Any evil you wish him will destroy you,” replied the Master.
After six months, the grocer returned to report that he had had to close down his shop as he had feared. Why? Because he was now the Manager of the chain store and his affairs were in better shape than ever before!’
Sometimes, the very things that we fear turn out to be our biggest blessings! Yet because as human beings, we have limited vision, we don’t initially see them as such. When you feel overwhelmed with negativity regarding any situation, bless it! Cast the burden.
“Cast thy burden upon the Lord” (Psalm 55). Don’t allow your heart to be burdened by anything, including negative thoughts.
The most powerful exercise I know for casting the burden is the following: Take a sheet of paper and divide it into two columns. At the top of the left hand side, put: ‘list of things for me to do.’ On the right, put: ‘list of things for God (or the Universe, or Source Energy) to do.
Under your list, include everything you feel empowered to handle. On the right, include everything that feels overwhelming. You don’t have to ask for a specific solution to your problem, you can simply ask for a ‘peaceful resolution’ of the situation. Once you do this, you must not worry about your situation. Worrying means that you doubt that the solution to your problem already exists, and will keep the problem active in your experience.
Allow a divine solution to be presented in your life, in perfect timing. I promise you, it will be infinitely better than anything that you could ever come up with yourself!
Don’t allow hatred to become your undoing. “Love your enemies, and bless them that curse you.” The energy we send out ÔÇô positive or negative ÔÇô has a boomerang effect and always comes back to us. Peace is always an inside job!