Sunday, April 27, 2025

In marriage, you get the certificate before writing the exam

Marriage is an exceptional institution because it is the only one in which a married couple is awarded a certificate before sitting for the exam. When one fails in marriage they approach the courts to nullify the marriage certificate. But in the past that was not the case because marriage was ordained to be a lifetime covenant and not a terminal contract.

Depending on the foundation on which the marriage was built, the storms of life may just blow it away. They say you won’t enjoy marriage, but rather endure it. When one buys an electronic gadget it comes with a manual that explains how it can be used or fixed if it has a fault. If it doesn’t work you simply take it back to the manufacturer or approved technician.

That makes one wonder why married couples don’t want to abide by the principles set in the marriage manual. Married coupled must complement each other. No one is perfect, so when one spouse is weak another is strong. A woman by nature is a hospitable person, so it becomes easy when a man has visitors for a woman to take over the role of hospitality.

A ma is logical in many ways whilst a woman is emotional. Before we go deeper into the fundamentals of marriage let me liken marriage to an undeveloped plot of land that one needs to develop so as to make it a habitat fit for human beings. When you are given that land there are trees, grass and anything that one can think of in an undeveloped land. It is your duty as the new plot owner is to transform it from being a bush to being a home. That is how marriage is; you work on your marriage for it to be successful. Failure to work on your marriage only brings frustrations and regrets. One need to be ready to enter marriage or disaster is inevitable. Below are at least seven areas that you need to be conversant in, for when you lack knowledge destruction becomes you portion;
Mental maturity ÔÇô very essential in that the state of mind should be sound to make quality decisions, that’s why people with mental problems are a risk in marriage.

Physical maturity ÔÇô you should not be a novice, your body should be ready and able to carry out what is needed to maintain an intimate relationship.

Moral maturity ÔÇô being morally upright gives you the edge of raising morally upright children that people respect and hold morality in high esteem.

Social maturity ÔÇô you cannot exist in a vacuum you need to know how to socialize with different people who do not share the same beliefs, ethics and customs with you.

Emotional maturity ÔÇô marriage needs a person who has stable emotions because many adjustments take place when building a successful marriage and some of them will not go well with you; for how do you expect two imperfect people to live with each other and not step on one another’s toes.
Financial maturity ÔÇô without proper financial maturity romance is frustrated, though you may be not having enough for now, making sound financial decisions for your future is very important for good marriage.

Likewise there are some reasons people should never ever get married for, not even in your dreams because instead of living ever happily after, for you it will be the opposite. Do not ever embark in marriage because of; sympathy, physical beauty, status or wealth and impatience. There are different conventional roles for men and women, a man is commanded to love his wife nothing withstanding. This love is not conditional because it is not based on what the wife has done or not done. It calls for a man to love his wife as he loves his body. That is what I find it very amusing to hear a man calling his wife a monkey, because that makes him a male monkey. Nobody who loves his body can mistreat it. Women submit to your husbands; for a woman submission is not an obligation but a must. Some men take advantage and abuse women based on this command but it was not meant to violate women.

The truth about marriage is that the enemy is afraid of a solid marriage because it leads to intact families and nations. So he tries all tricks to destabilize marriage and does this so subtly that people only notice when it’s too late. In conclusion when you do not operate in wisdom your life becomes full of frustrations that make your spouse not to take cognizance of you.

A depressing story is told; one day a pastor ministering to the congregation asked all widows to stand up, a woman sitting next to a man who happened to be her husband stood up, the man quietly scratching the lady not wanting to rouse any attention said in a whisper, ‘honey honey they said widows’ the woman shouted angrily said “leave me alone are you alive, tell me are you alive.” Let us respect the institution of marriage to fight all the ills in our families and nation at large.

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