Saturday, September 26, 2020

Is Facebook the new paparazzi?

That drunk person with the dirty white t-shirt sleeping on the bar counter in Kabo’s Facebook album looks pretty familiar.

You wonder where you have seen him before until you find yourself tagged as the culprit.

There’s another picture of you dancing on top of the pool table; you posing with the doorman; you gulping down a mug of draft while strange people in the back are cheering you on.
This could ruin you.

Your aunt is on Facebook and she is one of 999 Facebook friends. You lied and told your boyfriend you wouldn’t be in town for that weekend but you really just wanted to go out to Bull’n’Bush with the girls and not have him stuck by your side the whole night.

Don’t you hate it when they do that?
The in-thing nowadays is catching your friends at their most awkward and funny moments live on camera and posting the pictures online.

The number of friends and relatives on Facebook is overwhelming. Everybody knows where you where during the weekend, what you got up to, who kissed who when they wasn’t supposed to, who was wearing what, who looked like Bigbird in that horrible outfit.
Your profile will show how many times you have changed your relationship status from in a relationship to single this past year.

Besides, I thought single just meant you are not married.
Facebook is the self-imposed big brother!

Whether you like it or not, people will know more about you than you thought possible, and they will judge you for it.

By the way as long as Facebook is around, those crappy pictures will always be available for all to see.

Note to yourself: Be careful who you pose for, where and how your picture is being taken.

Stop posing for pictures taken by strangers. They will post them on Facebook, and even if you aren’t friends or don’t have mutual friends, those pictures will find you and haunt you.

What’s worse, if the person doesn’t want to remove your picture, there is nothing you can do about it.

A friend of mine once got so desperate she reported drug use on the photo so that Facebook could delete the picture.
Two years later, that picture of him trying on my primary school dress is still there under his photos because I simply refuse to delete it, unfortunately his lady friends don’t find it amusing at all

Hey, if I have a crush on a guy I research about him…on Facebook and nine out of ten times they are most likely to part of the worldwide membership. And god knows I will find information about him, his social circles, his past girlfriends, whom I will also try to measure myself against.

It’s hard to find someone who is not part of the latest Facebook craze. It can even serve as an ice breaker.

“Hey, I have seen you somewhere before, are you on Facebook?”

Of late, there were a number of reports about people getting fired for the comments they made on Facebook, paparazzi style.

The platform just basically allows one to say whatever they want, whenever they want, however they want. Need I mention paparazzi again?

Apparently, in South Africa, a man got fired for posting a comment about his boss which was then seen by a colleague who then went to report his wayward behavior.

“My boss is a gaat (ass in English),”his post read.

The world’s favourite man at the moment, the master of Facebook politics, Barack Obama, once went forward with a controversial statement to students nationwide when he said, ”Be careful what you post on Facebook; it will be pulled out later on in your life.”

Apparently, some companies have even started using Facebook as another way to make a background check on potential employees.

I think everyone of us who has experienced such humiliating moments and read uninformed heartless comments about the pictures definitely know how Kate Moss, Amy Winehouse, Britney ”the loser” Spears, and the rest of the celebrities feel.

The pictures are there, the drunken comments, the stupid and fun moments that will haunt you for the rest of your life.

I recently caught the bug when I uploaded a friend’s photos even though they weren’t your average acceptable photos. I guess I got too excited to have fantastic pictures in my album.
Before I knew it, all hell broke loose; people’s lives were in chaos and I was at the center of it, because of Facebook.

A friend of mine left me a comment that woke me up. ”Kagiso, you work for a prestigious newspaper, not that other one, some of these pictures need to be deleted, you are not the paparazzi,” said Sandra.

Next time you are at a party, having too much fun, and you see a camera light flashing somewhere, run!

Be careful, Facerazzi (our new name for the Facebook paparazzi) is watching, waiting; one wrong move and you are staring at a lifetime of torturous memories.

RELATED STORIES

Read this week's paper

Masisi creates his own “deep state”?

The government enclave is discussing a new law that will expand the president’s overreach and make it easier for the Directorate of...