There were two types of toy cars when I was a boy.
You had the homemade wire cars and the shiny plastic cars bought from the shops.
For many of us, the wire car was the only way of dreaming about owning a proper car the day we grew up.
Assembling a wire car required great skill and resources. Every part was salvaged from the rubbish dump. Like with proper cars, there were ugly and beautiful wire cars.
The less skilled like myself had to make do with ugly and unbalanced contraptions which, just like ugly proper cars, could do the job.
The skilled boy engineers could manufacture sleek wire machines which were a marvel to behold. Actually some boys were so good they even had their own car assembly plants.
Whereas we assembled our contraptions for personal use, they could earn pocket money by manufacturing cars for boys from well off families who were waiting for their parents to buy them a toy car from the shop.
Your choice of car told the story of where you came from. The rich kids drove their nice cars and when they broke down, they looked to the skilled engineers to fix them. When their car became a write off they would even donate it to the engineer, who tended to come from wire car background whilst waiting for a new model from their parents.
The engineers would lovingly work on the write off so much so that by the time they were through, the original owner would want it back.
Despite our cars telling the story of our family backgrounds, ultimately we were all boys, fantasising about the day when we would be men with enough money to buy ourselves real cars driven by grown ups.
For the same reason that no boy was worthy of the status without a toy car, no grown up man is worthy of his status without a car. Ownership of a car determines the quality of the life of the male species.
If you are a man and don’t own a car you have no chance of getting a pretty woman. Even if you are lucky enough to secure one, chances are she will be stolen from you some day by a real man driving a sleek machine. Indeed the car is the engine that drives our lives.
In fact, the faster the car, the better. If you drive a slow car then everything in life will come to you at a similar pace.
I am reminded of cars because I have a nagging problem. Since the day I graduated from wire cars, I have owned several cars. By time I was out of short pants I knew which car I was going to buy the day I had saved enough money. It does not shame me to say my first serious ambition was to own a car. So a car is very important to me. That is why I have this nagging problem.
My problem is the law. In fact it seems the faster the car, the greater the problem with the law. I now have the mind to defy the authorities. As a man who obeys the law, I have never had any reason to harbour subversive thoughts. But I cannot take this any longer. Something has to give.
Like I said for a man to be a man he has to drive a beautiful vehicle. In addition the car has to be fast. Speed is where my problem is.
I cannot understand why I am penalised for speeding. I accept that we have to share the road with other drivers and pedestrians. We also cannot drive recklessly because that would put the other users in danger.
Of course, I am not blind to the fact that many people have lost their lives in road accidents on account of bad driving and speeding. Innocent pedestrians have also being maimed and killed by bad drivers.
I have no dispute with these facts. What I have a problem with is why penalise someone like me who has never been involved in an accident and who drives very well, but very fast.
I can no longer accept that driving over the speed limit when I cause no harm should earn me a penalty. My issue is simple. Why should I be penalised for what is not my fault?
When I was a boy I could accept responsibility when my wire car knocked over somebody’ s chicken.
Culpability lay with me because I was the manufacturer of the car. I made the car and drove it.
Now why must I get into trouble for driving a car made by someone else at a speed decided by the same manufacturer?
I am of the view that the speed limit should be done away with. For as long as the speedometer and the power of the engine permit the car to go as fast as it can, then let those who have the courage drive as fast as they want.
We should only be penalised if we cause accidents or are found to be driving recklessly. I am now convinced the authorities are cowards. They are scared of the carmakers and now want to bully us.
It is the manufacturers who decide on the speed limit and on the engine capacity. If the government wants over speeding to stop then it must confront the carmakers and call them to order. The state mustn’t expect us to do its job when it very well knows where the problem emanates.
So I have made a major decision.
From now on I am going to get in my car, fasten my seat belt and drive as fast as I please. I will stop if the police speed catches me way over the limit. The traffic cop will come to me shocked at the speed at which I am driving.
I will greet him nicely and on a hot day even offer him a ice cold soft drink. He will ask me to disembark in order to go confirm the reading on the speed trap. I will confirm everything. He will then get out his receipt book and write out a hefty fine.
I will politely take the receipt, crumple it and toss it into the nearest bin. The cop will be even more shocked and call his colleagues to come and witness the scene.
In a clam voice I will inform them that I am not paying any speeding fine because the manufacturer of the car intended it to be driven at that speed. That is why in the price I paid at the dealership they did not give me a discount for driving at the speed limit.
When the car price is decided it is calculated looking at the engine power and how fast it can go.
My last word to the cops would be to tell all car manufacturers to make cars that don’t go beyond the prescribed speed limit. Otherwise we must be given a discount as compensation for not utilising the vehicle’s engine power and maximum speed!
