It is a wedding scene that could be commonplace in future. Two Batswana men, in matching suits, radiating pure joy, get married. Clutching glasses of champagne, the two men lean into each other, their lips locked in an ecstatic kiss. The wedding guests swirling around them break out into cheers.
In a society whose intolerance for same-sex romance has forced many gays to remain in the closet, painting such a blissful scene of a wedding between two men could enrage the anti-gay lobby.
Indeed, it could even anger those who cherish the preservation of Botswana’s cultural norms. Yet the reality is that the country is witnessing an increasing trend in homosexuality.
Much is borrowed from the more liberal Western society. For proof that gay marriages are part of a growing consensus on same-sex liaisons across the world, you need only ask Kasper Jensen and Aeden Blanso of Denmark. One April afternoon two years ago, the two young men, who had been dating for five years, got married in the Nordic country.
“I grew up thinking that one day I would meet the right man, fall in love and get married,” said Jensen after the wedding. “You hear about these other countries where gay marriages and homosexuality are banned and it seems so sad. People should have the lives they want.”
It was October 1, 1989 in Denmark still when Axel and Eigel Axgil became the first couple in the world to legalize their union. On May 26 the same year, the country’s parliament had passed the gay-marriage bill with a clear majority. The relative ease with which Denmark enacted that historic moment is still unusual.
Denmark provided a model of tolerance for the rest of the world to follow. Since then, at least seven countries have made same-sex marriages legal, with more authorizing homosexual civil unions. Many other countries are still playing catch up.
Botswana is among those where same-sex relationships still face stiff resistance. Indeed, for moral and religious conservatives here, gay and lesbian sex provokes howls of outrage. Still, in a society where gay liaisons are dismissed with horror, the pro-gay lobby has over the years grown more teeth. It has been spurred on by organisations like the Lesbians, Gays and Bisexuals of Botswana (LEGABIBO) and the Botswana Network on Ethics Law and HIV (BONELA).
For Botswana’s gays, homosexuality is a choice based on biological, psychological and social factors ÔÇô complex interlaced dynamics which shape their sexual orientation. It is no longer about being right or wrong.
But in a still-conservative society, homosexuality is nevertheless a crime. Where not criminalised, same sex relationships are held up as a cultural taboo, as immoral, and those involved are not eligible for marriage nor allowed to adopt children.
Botswana is however not alone: even in countries where legislation allows gay partnerships, it does not fully equate gay unions with straight or heterosexual ones. Many of such liberal countries bar homosexuals from adopting children, and refer to the sanctioned relationships as “registered partnerships” rather than marriages.
In Botswana, even orphanages that belong to the Roman Catholic Church, which is soft on homosexuality, have a strict policy that does not allow adoption of children by homosexual couples.
These prejudices date back to when sexuality was primarily associated with procreation. Since no off spring could be borne of a homosexual relationship, it was perceived as an extreme perversion of the human sex drive.
Statistics show that only 3 percent of African countries recognise same sex relationships. Also, 23 percent do not recognise gay unions, but also do not consider them illegal. Oddly, 13 percent ÔÇô predominantly sub Saharan African countries like Zambia, Malawi, and Lesotho ÔÇô consider homosexuality a criminal offence if those involved are male. There is no criminal offence if the involved partners are female. For the rest of Africa, homosexuality is punishable by law and is not socially accepted owing to religious and moral beliefs. South Africa has gone against the norm by legalising homosexuality and recognising same sex marriages. Gays in South Africa can get married, adopt children and serve in the army.
In 1998, Botswana’s Penal Code further criminalised gay sexual activity by extending the law to include female to female sex as a crime. The law carries a penalty of 7 years for those found guilty. Against the background of the law, some people in Botswana believe that homosexuality is an extremely negative inclination that if legalised would open the flood gates to the impermissible. Others hold a dissenting view.
“As far as I am concerned, a crime should be linked to acts that hurt, destroy, or in any way make the lives of other citizens unbearable,” says Dr Seipone Mphele of the University of Botswana’s Department of Psychology. According to this view, homosexuality does not directly affect the way people go about their daily lives; government should therefore invest more time and money fight real crime.
Morality is often based on religion, philosophy and tradition. The constitution of Botswana allows freedom of association for individuals yet still goes on to persecute those who use their prerogative to choose whether they get involved in homosexual relationship or not.
According to ancient myths, African elders used to “get rid” of children who displayed homosexual tendencies at an early stage. Though research has not proved that homosexuality carries genetically attributions, it is widely perceived that the environment in which a child is brought up in can shape their sexuality. For example a male born in a predominantly feminine family would be more in touch with their feminine side. Prior sexual abuse can lead to a person growing up mistrusting a particular sex thus resulting in getting involved in same sex relationships.
“Some girls are born with congenital adrenal hyperplasia (CAH). Although they generally grow up to have a female gender identity, they may be less content with being female and more interested in being male,” says Dr Mphele. “Males have Androgen ÔÇôInsensitivity; their bodies may look feminine and they may develop a female gender identity and mental abilities that are more feminine than male.”
Portia Loeto, a University of Botswana student, says though societal beliefs insist heterosexual is the norm, Botswana should not stifle gay rights by criminalising homosexuality. “The way people choose to express themselves sexually is diverse; their choices do not make them any less human,” Loeto says.
There are two extremes in Botswana. Those who strongly feel homosexuality is a crime, immoral and an abomination to humanity link homosexuality with other social ills like the spread of HIV, child molestation, prostitution and the overall moral decay of our society. It is because of this mindset set that prisons are not being provided with condoms despite the fact that there is evidence that inmates go into prison HIV negative and come out HIV positive. Others however perceive homosexuality simply as a lifestyle choice.
Despite the efforts of LEGABIBO and BONELA, Botswana still has a long way to go if gay rights are to be a feature of society. Meanwhile, the number of gay people who have come out in the open about their sexual orientation has risen. Acts of violence and hate crimes against them have likewise risen.
Decriminalization of homosexuality does not appear within reach, but as the world has witnessed, even the most conservative of societies eventually open up. It is not far-fetched to think ahead to Botswana’s gay rights activists working to achieve adoption rights and the right to wed in church for gay couples ÔÇô to say nothing of the right of homosexuals to call their relationships marriages.
