It is the classic tale told by most “committed” guys. There are many of us. We spend every other day whiling away time after work at the local pub because the thought of going home is simply revolting. We are fed up with the ugly, nagging and bitchy women that we have at home.
For the newly married and the still in love women, please note that the daily night-out-with-the-boys or working-late-at-the-office excuse might just be a sign that things are not going very well in matrimonial paradise. But here lies the big question: Just what went wrong? The answer is often very simple: The woman changed.
Once they have gotten us to commit, the bubbly, sexy and lively girl that we met and proposed to suddenly become moody, overweight and grumpy. Women wrongly think they are home and dry after getting their man to settle down. But, no sweetie, that is not the case. A man stays young forever. Many men watch porn and we just love the sexy chicks in porn flicks. We have friends who date sexy young things and we want some of that. And guess what, they want us too!
Suddenly, the “taken” woman has lost interest in raunchy sex. One round of missionary style sex, twice a week if you are lucky, is deemed more than enough. Not that I care, because more often than not she has gained weight. She doesn’t want to try new stuff, and she is simply unattractive.
Suddenly, she wants to talk about mortgages, kindergarten and pediatricians instead of planning a romantic holiday in Cape Town or going clubbing with me. She wants us to hang with other couples, who are simply boring. I know because I see the glazed, bored and surrendered look in the husbands’ eyes. So I escape to find suitable amusements. And, believe me, there are plenty.
Men simply want their hot chicks back. We crave for hot sex. We don’t want you to be friends with your mother in laws. Babes, it might be easy to ensnare a man, but it is not easy to keep him. We get easily distracted.
Baby, you have to love yourself. Work hard to look pretty for me. I have to feel proud watching other guys ogling you while I am checking out their girlfriends at the mall. Stay sweet. Stay sexy. Sex is the single most important thing that will keep me on a leash. Doggy style and blow jobs are not for single chicks only. Please love, lose weight. Stop hugging the ice cream bowl. Stop becoming disinterested in me just because we have a baby. The baby is supposed to harness our relationship, not destroy it.
And please, stop nagging. I already have a mother and older sisters. I am a fun guy. I love life. Up your game or ship out.
