What is it about life that people don’t get? What is it about life that I don’t get too? Why can it be so confusing even for brightest and sharpest amongst us? Is it because it gives us choices or is it because we lack choices? Could it be the lack of choices or the abundance of them? There are those that say that life is a series of choices and that where you are, is a result of all the choices you have made up to this point in time, and that in order to set your life in totally different trajectory you have to start making the right new choices.
I have a question for such people, my question is how do I know that my choice is right? I mean what if I have gotten to this point in my life and its not exactly where I want to be and all along I have been thinking that I am making the right choice, pulling the right moves.
What is the right choice? What constitutes the right choice? To answer that lets pretend we go visit a wise guy for the answer.
When faced with such questions what do you think the wise guy might say? May be he might say do something that feels right for you at the moment. Maybe they might caution you that just because it feels right doesn’t mean that it will feel natural and easy for you to execute the decision. But then you may wonder how can something that feels so right not feel natural to implement doesn’t that make it feel wrong?
At this point you may begin to get a little confused and start thinking that this know it all type is trying to get all wise with you.
But let’s say that he tenders another explanation, one that goes like this. You see, in life you have been given the power to choose and the freedom to choose does not free you from the consequences of your own choices. Most people, it seems to want to have the freedom to choose but want to be absolved of all responsibility of the consequences of their actions if they get the results they were not looking for. However, they want all the credit if they make the right choices.
That is why people blame and point fingers when things don’t work the way they thought they would. But mind you the same people who are pointing fingers are the very same people who would have shouted from the roof tops if the same choices they made had brought different results. So the key thing the wise guy might say is to accept equally the responsibility of your actions whether or not they yield the results you want. That way there will be less room for confusion, because the reason why people are so confused about life is that at different stages in their lives they look for different persons to blame when things don’t work out but when they workout they don’t get confused about who to give the credit to.
Even those amongst us who consistently win the chest pounding competition occasionally find themselves blaming their shadows or bad luck for the unintended consequences of their actions. The insatiable temptation to blame is a universal trait present in the best and the worst of us. However, it would be interesting to know that those who most of us look up to as positive role models in our communities tend to overcome the temptation to blame. Instead of blaming they ask of
themselves the universal question: what was it about me that contributed to the results that I got?
This results in them taking more responsibility for their own advancement than an average individual will. So the more responsibility you accept for both your successes and failures not only will you be less confused but you will also succeed more often. This is the simple answer to being less confused about life the wise guy says.
Harry S. Truman, the 34th President of the United States is known to have had a sign on his desk that read “THE BUCK STOPS HERE” This was meant to indicate that he didn’t ‘pass the buck’ to anyone else but accepted personal responsibility for the way the country was governed.
Truman didn’t originate the phrase, although it isn’t likely that we would ever have heard of it had he not adopted it. President Truman knew what most successful people know, that it starts with you and it stops with you. Maybe you should adopt that as you personal motto, but whether or not you accept it does not mean that it cease to stop with you. It always has and it always will.
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