Just what this world would be without white people leaves me shuddering at the thought.
Let me warn you, I have no time for any sentimental nonsense. As far as I am concerned, white people have done a lot of good to this world.
Those who take issue with my view are entitled to believe the world would be a better place without the inventions of white people.
They will have to show us those inventions, not originating from the white race, that have made the world such a great place.
As the stifling heat takes grip, I am glad someone had the presence of mind to design the air conditioner. Now I just escape the heat into my lounge and switch on the gadget and life becomes bearable again.
I hear it is white people who invented the appliance.
For the life of me I cannot imagine life without television. The last time I checked, it was white people who invented this wonderful appliance. Initially the pictures came out in black and white. Then some white person thought long and hard and came up with colour television. Now here we are enjoying all kinds of images from around the world.
I guess other races might have invented other useful things. But I cannot recall any invention that beats what white people have come up with. That is not to say I am fond of white people.
Okay, I get along with the few I know, if only because they keep to themselves and I keep to my race.
I hear there are some nice white people out there. Apparently there are also nasty whites. Lots of them. This is normal.
It is a situation that obtains with every race on earth. By the same token, I know lots of nice black folk. And I know plenty of nasty blacks who can just bewitch you because they think you are full of yourself. They don’t think twice about casting a spell on you because you have built a bigger house.
So every race has its good and bad.
But notwithstanding the fact that there are nasty whites, I like their inventions, without any qualification.
Take the car.
What would the world be without the motor car? Now show me anyone who does not dream of owning a set of wheels.
There is none.
The car is the greatest invention in the history of the world. It was invented by white people. Even those races that hate whites just love the car. It is like communists who don’t have to live in Cuba, but extol all the virtues of a terrible system where a man is told what to do by people who were not elected by anyone. None of the local communists I know want to live in Cuba. They prefer America or Britain, the countries which they hate with a passion. The whites invented a word for this sort of behavior.
It is called hypocrisy.
So, hypocrites are non white people who hate whites but love their inventions such as the car.
In the village they have an idiom that says if a man gives off a pungent odour, and then his possessions smell likewise. In other words, you cannot hate a man, yet love his possessions.
To all those who hate white people, I say show some consistency by hating their inventions. And don’t even tell me that whites hate you. If they do, I guess its tough luck because you use their inventions.
Anyway enough of race politics.
My subject is about inventions and how they make life so much easier for some of us. I look forward to even better inventions in my lifetime. But, of course, the dream invention I want white people to come up with is a job where I do absolutely nothing and get paid lots of money.
Now, that would be an invention.
Anyway, after the car what other inventions have captured the imagination of the world?
The car has now lost its lustre for the reason that everyone can own one. In many developed countries, cars are nothing to write home about. In fact, they keep cars for a few years and then dump them in third world countries.
When those hand me down cars arrive on our shores, overnight, we who buy them enjoy dignity and respect.
After the car, my favourite invention is the cell phone. This is a brilliant gadget.
Again, it took a white person to think of the cell phone. I don’t want any blacks or Indians telling me the idea was stolen from their forefathers. If that is the contention, then the matter belongs in a court of law.
In the meantime, I will credit white people with inventing the cell phone.
There was a time no so long ago when the cell phone was the size of a brick. Even then, the few owners of the gadget were the envy of all around them.
To earn dignity and respect, the cellphone had to ring either at a wedding or funeral. Everyone would turn to look and admire the proud owner who would proceed to talk at the top of their voice.
We all dreamt of owning a cellphone. But just like the car, it became common place in developed countries and soon everyone in our part of the world had their own.
The inventors then came up with sleek designs which put those brick versions to shame.
Now courtesy of white people, there is another wonderful gadget called the Blackberry.
It is a variation of the cellphone that performs miracles.
Like all great inventions, the Blackberry is out of the reach of many. Only those with enough money can afford it.
Now white people have done something that will enable all of us to own a Blackberry.
You see the gadget is so good it cannot be tapped by anyone. No snooping security services can listen to private conversations.
Now we learn there are countries which have banned the Blackberry because of its delightful security features.
This is music to our ears.
Just like the car before it, we lesser mortals now have a chance to own the Blackberry.
The whites gave the car to the Japanese who in turn gave it to us very cheaply.
Now in the rich Arab countries, the Blackberry is no longer allowed.
Soon the gadget will arrive here, affordable to everyone. Watch this space, everyone will soon be strolling around, Blackberry in hand.
Thank you white people, including the nasty ones!
