Friday, January 22, 2021

Everyone has obsessive stalker tendencies

The other day I posted a question on Facebook,”what’s the craziest thing you have ever done for love? Fair enough, I would have received a number of comments from people with crazy stories to tell.

But then I ruined it by revealing my crazy stunt for love. I stalked a guy who was my cousin’s best friend for about 8 years only to find out after a while that I didn’t like this guy at all.
I barely even knew him. I received a number of comments; unfortunately they were all expressing their sympathies for the wasted 8 years. It took me 8 years to realize he was just an illusion I created, the real person was far from who I made him out to be.

The sympathy comments were not what I was looking for. I wanted to know if I was normal. It made me look back to those years when I was convinced we were meant to be together.

I remember sending him silly messages after I had promised myself I wouldn’t do it anymore.
I clearly remember him replying once in a while and just disappearing after the 2nd message. I also remember him talking to me as if I was insane or just a child. I mean for goodness sakes I was 14, he was just 4 or 3 years older. I would hide my number and call him, when he answered the cat suddenly grabbed my tongue and ran wild with it. I would choke on the phone. I am pretty sure I did the heavy breathing too.

Whenever I would text and he wouldn’t text back I wondered why he didn’t realize that we were meant to be together. Because we didn’t school in the same town, I knew when he would come back home for holidays. Sometimes he would tell me he was in town, sometimes I would just bump into him(I lived for those days).He would change his number a couple of times and every time I would still end up having it. He finally gave up and decided to kiss me. I mean I had always thought that if he could just kiss me once I would forget him. I learned the hard way. Anyway my point is, I toned it down with the other guys but I still stalk them nonetheless, even my boyfriends have gone through that stage with me. I thought I have what Oprah termed a Love addiction only to find out I wasn’t alone. There are millions of us out there, thank god!

Let’s face it, there is a little bit of stalking tendencies in all of us. Of course we might not be willing to admit it because some of us have taken it a bit too far thus making the rest of us stalkers look bad.

The first thing we do as modern and modest human beings, when we come across someone we like but are too scared to approach them is to find out more of what we can about the person, his life, his friends, what he likes, where he usually hangs out etc.

This could lead to some of us becoming friendly with his cousins, relative or friends so that we have a chance of being introduced to him.

Some of course would be using the friends to milk information about him in a very non-incriminating manner, which could be a way of finding out whether he is single, whether he is boyfriend material or a player, where he prefers to hang out and all other useful information.

Without the stress and added effort of hustling friendship with his closest friends, a stalker s dream has now been created with the arrival of Facebook and a couple of other social networks.
I guarantee that one can almost always find anyone they are looking for in Facebook and find out a lot about them in their profile pages.

People basically lay out their lives on facebook, with their millions of pictures telling stories of their own.

Some even place their direct cell numbers on the web for the convenience of their long lost relatives or friends but without privacy settings the number is available to anyone who is a member of the social network.

“I mean is it really stalking if all I am doing is going through all his friends s list and checking to see if he has any pretty girls as friends, who I will slowly hate plus its not like I am sending him creepy messages,” one would try to reason.

Well, that is girls, modest but crazy, and then there are some who don’t know when to stop, the ones that know you have a girlfriend but will call you nonetheless.
Comment on every one of the 200 pictures you have posted on facebook, write on your wall everyday and call you to ask stupid things everyday.

Those are the ones who are not in control of their stalkerish behaviour,they will ask your friends to hook you up with them and give you hints that you can’t miss and sms you telling you how much you belong together.

These are also the most dangerous, as they are desperate and opportunists, to them guys who hang out in pubs are the easiest prey.

They would research about you until they know each and every place you visit, and they will make sure they are always there.

They will wait for you to get drunk out of your mind, which is what boys of today normally thrive on, once they see you are out of it, they will come and strike a normal conversation with you, next thing you wake up next to them and they will be telling you how much they love you and how they would love to have your baby, once you are there, there is no escape.
Every woman that comes into your life will be threatened and they will run away from your psycho baby mama.

Either way even if you are careful, women, will always have a way of getting what they want, we just wanted you to be aware, it’s no longer a man s world.

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