Gaborone Clinical psychologist, Dr Bame Mophuting, says,“Feeling anxious about going to therapy or seeking it out is completely normal. If it’s your first time, you may worry beforehand about what actually happens in therapy and about meeting your therapist. Your first session is usually about them getting to know you better, and you getting to know them better too. It will allow you to see if you like them and connect with them and if you can see working with them going forwards. Trust is a huge part of therapy, and if you don’t get on with your therapist and would prefer to change, then that is definitely an option. Therapy is about helping you, and it requires a level of trust and comfort to be able to discuss your thoughts and feelings. Most people think they don’t need therapy because they have their friends and family. Most relationships you already have in your life are reciprocal relationships, meaning both people are going to talk about their own issues. It’s also possible your friends and family are going to be full of opinions that may not be all that helpful when you’re needing support. When you meet a therapist, you don’t have to edit your true feelings, and fortunately, the session will not (and should not!) turn into your therapist’s issues.”
There are many creative names for therapy, quite reflective of the various stigmas. Some call it mental brainwashing and/or headshrinking. Unfortunately, to this day, the realm of therapy or counseling still remains quite mysterious to most people, somewhat like a magic trick. Many ask themselves what really happens in that room, what do they do, will I still be myself when I leave? If I go to a therapist, does that mean I’m crazy, weak or a failure? what will others think? what if I’m seen coming out of that kind of office? Such concerns are quite natural given our socio-cultural conditioning. Unfortunately, as a result, many people decide not to pursue counseling despite experiencing significant emotional, physical or mental distress. While being in therapy is more normalized than ever, the sad fact remains that the reason people cite most for not seeking it is concern about how others will see them.People often turn to counselling when they are going through a difficult time in their lives. These difficulties can include needing help with addiction recovery and suicide prevention, as well as other symptoms that disrupt their lives, such as anxiety, depression, and PTSD. Therapy provides a wonderful lifeline, where there is someone available to talk to when needed. Many reach out to them about hardships in life, how to adjust after suffering a loss, how to overcome addiction or how to handle post-partum depression.The perception society has of individuals going through therapy and counselling has still not been completely normalized. Often instead of it being seen as normal, it is still seen as having a mental “illness”. It is a label that remains difficult to lift from the views of society. This can contribute to self-imposed stigma because individuals who tend to avoid therapy don’t want people to think they are “ill”. There can also be a certain level of pride that prevents someone from getting therapy because they feel as if people think of it as a sign of weakness.
Senior Social Work lecturer at the University of Botswana, Dr Poloko Ntshwarang says, “There are still some misconceptions about therapy. A lot of that has to do with the stigma attached to seeking therapy for mental health problems. One would think in this day and age that such a stigma would be eradicated by now, but the opposite is true. One of the biggest problems with the stigma of mental health therapy is lack of opportunity. Many people that are suffering from mental health issues are held back in their professional and personal lives. Sometimes health insurance companies refuse to cover the costs of mental health help, making it virtually impossible for some to seek help. These things lead to the person suffering on their own. They cannot get the treatment they need to live a normal life. They often feel left out or unsuccessful because they cannot treat themselves. A lot of people go to therapy every day. It doesn’t matter if you need help with a mental illness or you need to talk through issues, you aren’t “crazy” if you go to a therapist.”
Most people who initiate counseling do not have a serious mental illness. They have serious life challenges or are going through difficult life-cycle transitions that may be taxing their current ability to cope. This, in turn, may be adversely affecting their well-being and ability to function as well as they would like. Examples of serious life challenges can be dealing with chronic work-related stressors; career issues; financial problems; health issues or a recent health diagnosis; family or parent/child conflict; cultural assimilation; and academic issues. Examples of difficult life-cycle related transitions can be the death of a family member or friend; the ending of a romantic relationship or close friendship; family/couple changes related to the addition of a child; getting married or divorced; caregiving for loved ones due to illness or disability; and decision-making challenges related to these life choices.Another misconception about therapy is that therapists will judge you or think you’re ‘crazy’. ‘Crazy’ as a term itself stigmatises people who are mentally ill and draws on outdated stereotypes of mental illness. Aside from this; a therapist will not judge you. They are there to listen and guide you in recovery. Everyone is unique, and has their own ways of communicating, behaving, and interacting with others. There is no right or wrong way to speak to a therapist, and as long as one is being honest and authentically themselves, therapists will be able to help with whatever troubles there may be.
